I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize