It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize