Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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