Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize