Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize