Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
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