My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
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She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
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