I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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