Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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