I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize