does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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