i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
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Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Panties = found
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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