i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
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It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
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Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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