Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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