You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize