we have officially mastered the walk of shame
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
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1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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