Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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