Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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