just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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