:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
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forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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