why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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