Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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