I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize