My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize