I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
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