Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
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These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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