Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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