Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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