So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize