What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize