You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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