K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize