Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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