Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
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I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
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I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
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