I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
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My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
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It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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