somebody snuck up and got me drunk
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize