he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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