ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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