In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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