should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize