i just made my gag reflex go away.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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