Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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