Tell her she can't have a vagina
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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