Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I'm having to shit out rocks
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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