I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
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And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Blood and glitter go together right?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
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I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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