She is in my trunk
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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