There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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