Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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