i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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