went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
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