areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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